Monday, November 29, 2010
Every morning I awake with a fresh spirit of hope. Being alone out here is an emotional roller coaster ride. As things begin to slowly ramp up, one moment I’m bored; the next I’m inspired; and then concerned. Round and round it goes etc.. etc… I feel like one of those refrigerator magnets that display’s various moods, just pick the appropriate emotion for the moment. So it shouldn’t come as a surprise that I’ve also begun talking to myself as a form of entertainment. It’s not a schizophrenic thing, it’s more rhetorical like; “does this guy know he’s got way too much hair growing out of his ears…. he probably knows, but he just doesn’t care.” Actually, I see this activity as a mental exercise; more as an observation of my current environment, rather than being judgmental. Mostly, I do it for my own entertainment, just to crack myself up. Not a whole lot to do out here in Quartzsite, Arizona. Perhaps that is why I find myself taking on the role of observer and social analyst. I’ve begun to open myself up to this world, this “life on the fringe of society”, I have become a sponge, soaking up all that it is has to teach me.
Thursday, November 11, 2010
It has been said that most people perceive themselves with higher regard than what others may perceive them. Meaning, I may think my IQ is higher than what an IQ test may actually reveal, or I may believe that my hair line is not reseeding when, let's face it... it most certainly is. Well, I am here to confess today that I am, in fact, a bigger idiot than I ever realized. I’ve come to the realization that I have been arrogant, an over confident,obnoxious fool.
After losing everything that I worked so very hard for, I have been forced to take a long, hard look at myself, and folks I must say, the picture isn’t pretty.